Boobs and Poop

Since I've weaned the baby, my boobs have changed yet again. During the weaning weeks, I had a truly lopsided situation with one boob much larger than the other. As the milk dried up, I hoped that as they returned to their normal, pre-pregnancy size they'd also "bounce back" into place. In short, I was looking forward to the return of a pair of perky boobs I'll actually never see again. I recently described this latest boob situation by saying that my boobs are like soup, like balloons filled with a thick creamy soup. I now have to ladle each boob and deposit it into my bra. This has necessitated purchases of expensive bras - prior to this mommyhood thing, I rarely wore bras. When I did, a training bra might have done the trick. Now I understand the need for underwire and reinforced straps. While I don't have large boobs anymore - I am back to my little A cup size - I have to buy bras with a fervor I'd only ever heard described by my big busted...

I am in the middle of a Bikram yoga challenge. I committed to completing 25 Bikram yoga classes this month (May 2016). Bikram yoga is hard, hot, really intense and not for everyone. I've completed 18 classes so far this month. I have 7 classes remaining and due to some scheduling issues, I must complete my first "double" and attend 2 classes back-to-back this weekend. Before completing 18 classes in such a short span of time, I couldn't fathom doing two classes in a row. I know it will be a challenge, but at this point, I am confident I can do it. That's pretty huge because it's been awhile since I've felt totally confident I can do anything. I've been having a lot of doubts about what I'm doing with my life  these days. I often question some of our lifestyle choices and the decisions we make together as parents. I've been tired, and kind of lonely. I haven't been very motived to do me at all. I recently started binge watching Keeping ...

My posture sucks and as I actively work to improve it I see the impact on my abdomen.  We're starting to plan for our second. Do I leave the rolls as they are as I plan to let my stomach expand anyway?

I took a little time out to reevaluate what I'm trying to do  with this blog. Prior to that short self-prescribed blog hiatus, I'd been spending a lot more time creating a marketing strategy for the blog than I'd been spending writing. I started this blog to write, and only to write. I have very limited free time in my life right now, and very little opportunity to write. So I created this blog to serve as my journal and a sort of showcase of my writing ability. (I'm a new mom and at home a lot, without this uber busy schedule I used to maintain... I am not ashamed of my need for some external praise; this blog was intended to fulfill that need and has served that purpose well.) I have been exploring some contract work in ghostwriting, copywriting, editing and proofreading - so in addition to getting personal props from my Facebook friends, I have used this blog in an effort to get writing gigs. But that's where the "professionalism" was supposed to sto...

I was raised in a time so far removed from the 1800s' pillars of the cult of "true womanhood" that growing up I truly believed it was shameful for a woman or mother to not work. If she were at home, either as a homemaker or mother (or more than likely both), she should still be able to "pull her weight" and be employed too. I don't know exactly why I have been so hard on other women throughout my life, but another of the many things motherhood has taught me is that I was part of the problem. Meaning, I was part of this whole culture that devalues anything feminine and encourages women to "act like men" in order to be successful. There was a very recent time when I bought into that old-timey concept that woman equals inferior unless she can be a man... and a woman too, of course. Because she's not really a man, after all. She's less than a man - her only chance at success is to act enough like a man that in some moments other men forget...