Participation Trophy Woes

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I'm a millennial, but an older one. I was born in 1984 which I believe is the beginning point of the millennial generation. I want to talk about a specific aspect of growing up millennial: participation trophies. These were somewhat regular in my childhood. Although they were not always guaranteed, they were around enough to matter in critical times during my development. I had some participation trophies, while I also had some other earned trophies. However, those participation trophies had an impact on the "earned" trophies.

For me getting participation trophies taught me to devalue all trophies. When I was a junior or senior in high school, my mom found several awards I'd won shoved in a drawer in my bedroom. One such trophy was a writing award, another was my "Rookie of the Year" plaque I'd earned for diving into the Youth & Government program gung-ho even though it was my first year. I'd just joined the club, ran for an office, and was elected WHIP when I earned that plaque. But I was not proud of it. It embarrassed me. I couldn't accept that I had earned something someone else may not have earned... I assumed it wasn't that big of a deal, and that the other kids would be "compensated" for their good works in the program as well. In the same program, I was also a runner-up to present a mock legislative bill to the National Issues Commission (it was a big deal in the world of the club) and I simply assumed that everyone had been invited to participate in the exclusive NIC part of the program.

I was unable to recognize the recognition thrown my way until I was much older - deserving though I was - because being called out for something I'd done well didn't quite make sense to me when I was young.

For another such example, let me take you back to elementary school. I think I was in the 5th or 6th grade and competing in a Tae Kwon Do tournament. I believe I was a blue belt with a red stripe, and as a female fighter in upper elementary school, my competition was limited. There was only a handful of us girls signed up to spar (fight with pads on), and so we had to compete against whoever was willing to fight. We didn't have weight classes, and I remember thinking one of the girls I had to fight must have lied about her age because she was easily twice my size. When it as all said and done, I got my butt kicked but I took fourth place and earned a bronze medal. I think it may have been fourth of six or seven fighters, but I still placed. However, I didn't quite realize that I won fourth place until my mom explained it to me. I thought I had been awarded a medal for participation, and that 1st, 2nd, and 3rd place trophies were the only truly "earned" rewards. It didn't even occur to me that I had won anything. It didn't occur to me that there were 2-3 other girls who went home empty-handed. I just assumed we all got bronze medals for showing up. But I got on the mat, I fought and I won; I just didn't feel like a winner. I now wonder if I would have seen it differently at the time if I hadn't already had boxes of basketball trophies from Wilson's hoop camp and other awards in the garage collecting dust.

So there's this guy named Simon Sinek, and he is one of my favorites. He explains all of this far better than I can, and he really takes his time. I love his TED talks. He puts into words the phenomenon I felt as a participation trophy recipient growing up. He also talks about other ways that participation trophies impact the now adulting millennial population. Here he talks about "what's wrong" with the Millenial generation, and I love it.

I guess I'm hoping you enjoyed my lengthy preamble to this video. I really could have just posted the video. This is the best explanation for why and how hard work and patience as a young person are such critical skills to develop. Enjoy!

I hope you enjoyed that. Check out his channel for more.