Boobs and Poop

Last Sunday, my husband and I were discussing feeding the baby some rice cereal around our dinner time. He seemed concerned, and told me he didn't think we'd have time to get the store, get cereal, get back back home, crush it up and then feed her before 6pm. I was confused, so I asked him what he meant by "crush it up." He explained that in order for our daughter to eat Rice Krispies, we'd need to take the cereal and grind it down to a fine powder so it can be mixed in with her milk. I thought he was joking... I realized he was not. So I asked him, "Do you really think rice cereal for babies is just finely ground Rice Krispies?" We had a very strange, silent moment where we just stared at one another, not quite comprehending the other. Finally, understanding crept across his face and he laughed. I started laughing too, and was grateful we had that little chat before he fed the baby Rice Krispies.

Get a print of this awesome quote from Pen + Paper Flowers ! To my dear sweet and beautiful daughter, I started writing this when you were just weeks old and had already made a mark on the world. You completely changed me from my toes to the top of my head and life will never be the same. I started typing this letter with you strapped to my torso via the Ergo Baby (complete with infant insert), because it was the only way to get you to nap when you're desperately tired during the day... and I'm finishing it now months later, with you napping in your crib and the nanny here to help when you wake up.  Up until now, the days felt so long and I spent so much time trying to figure you out, or put you down for a nap. I still don't really know what I'm doing, and most of the time I fear you've figured me out and can see just how clueless I am before you. You are growing so quickly, and while the days seemed so long they have somehow gone by so fast! I'm k...

This image was taken from this awesome article on pileofbabies.com .  Leading up to baby girl's due date, I imagined nightmarish labor and delivery scenarios. I also worried about recovery (but mostly in terms of vanity). I had heard of tearing and episiotomies, yet I somehow convinced myself I'd be walking out of that hospital without stitches. Yes, there were times I pictured myself walking out of the hospital carrying my new baby. I tried hard not to have any specific expectations for going into labor or what it'd be like to be in labor. I just reassured myself that I'd "know" when it all started happening, then I'd be getting an epidural and there'd be nothing I could even do about the rest. A good friend of mine had told me that nothing is going to be as bad I'd imagined - I also reminded myself of her saying this quite often. About 3 days before our baby girl's due date (Friday), I had a lot of heavy discharge. I thought my wate...

Figuring out what I was going to do for "maternity leave" was so scary for me! I really felt lost. It took me a lot of research and talking through obstacles with friends before feeling confident that I'd filled out forms correctly and wouldn't somehow get penalized for taking time away from work for the baby. I was scared of being judged or perceived as lazy for taking too much time, or that I'd be an unfit mother if I didn't take enough time. And I worked for a company without a traditional HR department, so it was difficult to unearth the right information for me and hash out a plan. Actually, one of the main sources of stress for me was trying to create my plan for leave and ultimately returning to work. When I found out I was pregnant, I tried to wait until I'd made it through the first trimester before telling anyone at work that I was in the family way. But I can't keep my own secrets to save a life, so everyone in my department and a few o...

This image was taken from this list of offensive memes on mommyish.com .  After 5 months of exclusive breastfeeding and refusing to give the baby formula, I decided to bottle feed her formula last Saturday. It was weird, and I liked it. My husband was surprised and told me that from his perspective it seemed like I just flipped a switch, all of a sudden. Even when I got really sick two weeks ago and should have been on serious antibiotics, I just felt weird about introducing her to formula. But for some reason on Saturday morning, I was on fire and ready to try it. I mean I'd been thinking about it - mainly because now that I've been working again, I want to drink coffee all day. I've been so so so sick of having one measly cup of coffee in the morning and then worrying about my caffeine intake throughout the day. And now that our baby is sleeping like a champ most nights, I want to have wine with my husband on the back patio and enjoy my guiltiest of pleasures, an...

I am still processing all that happened and how much I (and everything around me) changed last year. 2015 was by far the craziest year of my life. It was so so so hard, but I was so excited about so much of it. I was miserable and elated at the same time for most of the year. I still don't think I'm ready to write about it... I'm not really ready to let the year go. But I'm also stoked to leave the discomfort and stress of pregnancy, family-full wedding events and actually giving birth far behind me. So with ambivalence I present this list of 20 major life events that occurred in 2015. Perhaps you'll instantly understand why I can't yet write about any of it... and why I have to acknowledge all of it, now. I started the year ~8 weeks pregnant. My Bachelorette Party weekend was in January (and I was obviously pregnant for it). In February, I backed my car into a parked truck and caused about $2,500 worth of damage to the trunk of my car.  My beautiful ...

There's no question that attitudes about marijuana use are changing due to increased accessibility to medicinal and recreational cannabis, and a general disinterest in the subject from the federal government. So I assumed that there would be a lot of debate surrounding pot smoking and pregnancy, nursing and parenting. I was correct on two fronts. I have come across a lot of interesting information and opinions about smoking pot during pregnancy and/or as a parent. Brave souls ( like Kiri Westby  and Toni Nagy  via the Huffington Post) started the public discussion about responsible parenting and recreational marijuana a couple of years ago. But it's been very challenging to find any conclusive information about the potential effects of marijuana use on a breastfeeding mom and/or her baby. Everyone agrees that trace amounts of THC may or do make their way into breast milk. But more research is needed to determine the potential impact on a nursing baby. The most compreh...

Some may be surprised that I decided to write about this. It's personal stuff. But after a lot of thought, I decided to share anyway because I found something really beneficial to my health. Anyone who knows me really well knows that I have struggled with anxiety and depression at different times throughout my life. Anyone who sort of knows me has probably heard me talk about this and been surprised. You may fall into that second category now. I'm naturally a fairly nervous person. What may seem very small and insignificant things to some can send me into a tailspin. I may worry over a mistake on a work project or something stupid I said at a party for weeks after the incident. I get stomach aches when this happens. I give just as much attention to worrying about the future as I do the past, and it results in even more stomach aches. In my late twenties, I was pretty sick of feeling sick to my stomach from all this worrying all the time. So I started seeing a therapis...